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Speaking of weapons for your desk.

by Marc on 5 July, 2005 at 20:22

A properly equipped office arsenal is a very important aspect of minion control at work.

My projectile weapon of choice is the Nerf N-Strike Pistol, capable of rapidly firing six Nerf darts with considerable accuracy and speed, simply brandishing this weapon has sent many a minion scrambling or ducking for cover. The satisfying THWACK that is heard upon successfully shooting one’s minions in the face is priceless. (I do recommend carrying two of the N-Strikes, particularly if one’s minions are similarly armed.)

Another weapon you may want to consider is perfect for that perilous walk to the bathroom, I like to call it the: “John Wilkes Booth Special”. This pump action pistol is small and easily concealed in your pants pocket. The “JWBS” is also handy for point blank assassination shots when one’s co-workers are deep in thought and totally unaware you are lurking behind them.

For serious cubicle and/or office defense larger and more powerful weapons may be required. If you are like me, you may often find yourself out numbered and surrounded by your rebellious minions. Under such siege like circumstances, I recommend maintaining a cache of X-Stream Missile Launchers. These formidable missiles are capable of inflicting mild bruises and almost visible red welts on even the most nimble and obstinate minion.

Guns Guns Guns

Comments Off on Speaking of weapons for your desk.

Why I’m voting for President Huffman…

by D. on 4 July, 2005 at 20:17

Sure Ike can win a war. Heck I even trust him to drop a couple of EZ NukesTM. But seriously, his best redeming feature is his barbeque? Is that really what we should have in a President?

Besides, Huffman is all about keeping the Furons under wraps. People really shouldn’t be aware of the vanguard of an invading alien race.

If you are crossing your eyes about now, then you probably haven’t played Destroy All Humans.

Another game from Pandemic (Mercenaries: Playgound of Destruction and Star Wars: Battlefront). They really got this right. If you like being the bad guy in a Mars Attacks, fifties style flying saucer special, then this is the game for you.

I especially like the Zap-O-Matic.

If only I had one, you know in my desk at work.

└ Tags: reveiws, Video Games
Comments Off on Why I’m voting for President Huffman…

Saw “The Pacifier”…

by D. on 4 July, 2005 at 06:34

I never realized that Navy SEALs are so tough that they don’t use guns…

Ever. Not even when faced off against four machine pistol toting thugs on jet skiis, and six more on the boat, holding the professor hostage.

Cool looking, beeping red-lighted, hockey-puck like throw bombs, sure… but guns?

Aparently Disney thought the idea of showing Elite US Military Personnel using guns would demean the SEALs too much. The cops at the end, on the other hand, are ready and eager to draw down on a mini-van full of minors.

WTF, mates?

└ Tags: Movies, Reviews
Comments Off on Saw “The Pacifier”…
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